My Life is a Science

 I confess that I thought a lot about my post. The reason is that I don't like to talk or write about my personal life. However, the following "scientific autobiography" unintentionally contains certain aspects of my personal life. But I think that my future readers (I hope my followers) would like to know from whom they get the information and the content. And I think I would also like to see the person behind it. I trust that a post with a personal tone will help with this.

I was already interested in natural sciences, especially astronomy and space exploration, as a primary school student: if I remember correctly, I was in first grade when I received the book "A világűr atlasza" ("The Space Atlas" authors Heather Couper and Nigel Henbest) as a Christmas gift. That's how I started to get acquainted with the subject, which, in addition to the beautiful photos, was also helped by sophisticated maps and other illustrations. I often secretly browse a hungarian scientific popularizer book serie  "Búvár Zsebkönyvek: Égitestek", (Celestial Bodies 1989, author: Csaba, György Gábor; see 1st Picture) next to it and - again - I was 

most interested in the pictures. And although I remembered a lot from these books, I still had problems understanding the connections. I looked for such things in the school and village libraries, and astrophotos always caught my eye. It was a significant "milestone" for me when, on a class trip, I went to Budapest, to the Urania Public Observatory (unfortunately discontinued 7 years ago) on Gellért Hill, where I could look into an astronomical telescope for the first time. Although I didn't really understand what I saw, it was still a defining experience for me. A few years later, my foster mother brought me a flyer from the Hungarian Astronomical Association (HAA; Magyar Csillagászati Egyesület, MCSE). At that time, this was mainly how membership recruitment was done. I wanted to join, but due to our financial circumstances, this was out of the question for a long time. I was already determined: I would definitely become an astronomer. Of course, sometimes childhood dreams like being an astronaut or a soldier arose, but these were not long-lived. Until the sixth grade: this is when I started to be interested in physics, especially nuclear physics and electricity. These were soon "joined" by chemistry. The experiments had the greatest impact on me - I was lucky enough to do some simpler ones at home. But deep down I still felt a kind of mystery, even a kind of superiority, in the world of material particles. My interest in the microcosmos has remained ever since, although in a slightly different form. This played a big role in my being the only one from my senior year to apply to high school. But before anyone thinks that as a pedantic student I only hunched over textbooks even at home, they are wrong. Today I can say: I was rather overconfident, which paid off. At the same time, a big change came in my life, which I was unable to process and properly manage for a long time, and it is also most likely the cause of my health problems that continue to this day. However, during this period (2003?) I began to "find my way back" to outer space, now "armed" with physical and chemical knowledge. A year earlier, in the dormitory, I had become acquainted with the Hungarian journal "Élet és Tudomány" (Life and Science ), which was almost obligatory at that age, through one of my roommates, who used the magazine to prepare for academic competitions. Later, I did the same, if there were articles in it that were interesting to me, and I mostly used them to inform myself about the current state of science. I must have been 16-17 years old when, on a free evening, I visited the "headquarters" of the HAA, the Polaris Public Observatory at Óbuda (in the 3rd District at  Budapest) people there made a deep impression on me again, especially since there was a very likeable girl among the visitors (of course, the acquaintance soon ended)... According to my memories, I went up to Urania again that same year, this time as a member of the professional circle. I was full of ambition, fueled by curiosity and a thirst for knowledge. But I was also naive, hot-headed and unfortunately arrogant. Because of this, I made several "fatal" mistakes that led to my departure. I must admit, however, that I had a relatively productive time there, e.g. for the first time (and so far the last) I had the opportunity to give a telescope demonstration to visitors, of course under "supervision" - I think it wasn't bad at first... Plus, at that time, the first Hungarian space simulator, Gemma, was built - as far as I know, by ELTE (Eötvös Loránd University) students - inside the observatory (which I was able to try out once). Urania has since ceased to exist, many members of the community there have become renowned professionals or teachers, but I think most of them have moved on. I still remember the spiral staircases leading to its dome, which were separated from the staircase by a wrought-iron gate. Or the dome itself with the almost iconic telescope, the balcony, from which there was a nice view of the city center. And finally to the astronomer and director of the institution, Otto Zombori, the Groups' "Uncle Otto". It was a pleasant but short period when, after the - still uncertain fate - Planetarium in Budapest (Népliget,  at 10th District), I visited an other planetarium at Kecskemét (Bács-Kiskun Country, Hungary), where I got to know the previous director Zoltán E. Kovács and other team members. After that, I spent about 10 years away from the capital city - and mostly away from telescopes - dealing with the world of stars. But in the latter respect, this era was not wasted: I was able to see the surprisingly dark sky of hills of Zselic near village Bárdudvarnok  (Somogy Country, Hungary) with the then president of the HAA,  internationally recognized Dr. Zoltán Kolláth (since retired), and several active members of the association; the area has since become part of the Zselic Dark-sky Park ("Zselic Csillagoségbolt-park"), in the creation of which Zoltán played a key role. I remember that this was where I first saw the Andromeda Galaxy and several other communities through a telescope. Later, from our yard, I managed to follow the maximum of the Perseid meteor shower in August (i.e. the period when the members of this group produce the largest number of "shooting stars"), as well as other accompanying meteor showers. At that time - with the help of my older brother - I recorded and more or less identified about 150 meteors. The records are still there, but I have not participated in a similarly long "shooting" since then. That was when I started to get better acquainted with space exploration. And when I could not "reach" the stars, I started to follow atmospheric phenomena, especially thunderstorms. In addition, that was when the term "supercell" entered the domestic public consciousness, and since more severe thunderstorms were not uncommon there, I "transformed" into a storm chaser. This immediately led to my acquaintance with the science of meteorology. Later, I also became interested in atmospheric optical phenomena when I saw a halo phenomenon with my own eyes for the first time, again from Budapest. I was actually able to observe and record these the best, since they don't require any special equipment. Apart from these, apart from a few more spectacular cloud formations and lightning photos, I didn't get much further, but following them was an interesting and enjoyable activity. Of course, photography shouldn't be imagined as taking a professional camera, putting the right filters and lenses on it, and off you go. Not at all. For a long time, I took photos with cheaper smartphones, whose cameras had a maximum of 5 megapixels. So I could almost only trust that by taking photos with the camera turned at different angles, the contrast between the individual details could increase. This way, the object will be more spectacular. Often, I had to select a few successful images from dozens - in the case of lightning, hundreds. 

Image2: a smartphone photo of an spectacular lightning from a night thunderstorm above Budapest. Captured from Ferencváros (Budapest IX. District) 31.08.2020, circa 11:30 pm via Huawei Y330-U01 model.

Image3: crepuscular (or Tyndall) rays before sunset from bus stop at Jáhn Ferenc Hospital (Budapest XIX. District), 28.07.2022. via Xiaomi Redmi 9AT smartphone)

Image4: detail of 22 degree halo phenomenon, one of my early successful atmospheric optical photos. Shooted by day at 26.04.2021. from Wekerletelep, Budapest (part of XIX.  District), with my Huawei Y330-U01 smartphone.

According to my humble recollections, in 2010(?) I also got closer to geology, which I had "despised" until then, when I collected my first fossils in Budapest. Since I returned to the capital, my interest has increasingly shifted in this direction: when my time - and my wallet - allowed it, I tried to travel to interesting locations for the purpose of collecting. Despite this, I have not yet had the opportunity to find, for example, a one-meter ammonite (I note: none), but I think that the situation is not so bad for a start. All this does not mean that I have "landed on the ground": exploring the starry sky remains "love at first sight", the "missteps" described above only confirm this feeling and also complement it. In many ways, I am different from an average amateur astronomer: I am not satisfied with the sight of the starry sky or a color photo of, say, the Orion Nebula. I would like to know more about the subject of my observation, for example, I would like to make measurements. So in this respect, I am somewhat closer to professional astronomers, since for them the best part of their activity is obtaining data and processing it. I am not saying that a professional researcher would not be moved by the sight of a total solar eclipse, or that some amateur astronomers do not perform calculations on, for example, comet orbits, but in general, while the former are objective (obtaining accurate information), the latter look at the sky from a largely subjective, aesthetic point of view. I mentioned that I have long wanted to be a "regular" astronomer. 

Image5: smartphone photo of a waxing gibbous Moon after sunset, it's a one of my best astrophotos yet.  Two towers of Neoroman-style catholic curch (Szent Margit Plébánia) are in the background. Photographed from Újlipótváros, Budapest (a part of the XIII. District), 30.07.2023. via ILike X5 Lite phone.

Well, in recent years I see less and less chance of doing so. The reasons are mainly financial and health-related. But maybe one day I will make up my mind. Who knows? After all, as the example of former Queen guitarist Sir Brian May shows, it is never too late to learn... Until then, amateurism will remain. It is "appropriate" for a person who is interested in astronomy to have a telescope. Well, the truth is that I did. Thanks to an earlier offer from an HAA member and the Associations' Secretary General I received a telescope, which I started practicing with, considering my modest means. But before I could use it, I moved, and things took a very unexpected turn... Now I have a binocular (small double hand-held telescope usually used for hiking or hunting). The image quality is good, but it is not really suitable for astronomical purposes. Along with enjoyment and curiosity, there is also the urge to push our own limits: to see as far and as much of the world as possible. This openness is somewhat similar to sports. If not the latter, I tried to convey the first two feelings to others in different forms: my first, albeit short, article in 2003 (?), was published in a local news at Kalocsa (Bács-Kiskun Country, Hungary) and in 2012 longer at Somogy Countrys' local news, as a student again. After that, I wrote this and that on a blog on the topic, I admit, overall it was a somewhat premature and immature attempt. In the meantime, I also created an early version of  article at the Hungarian Wikipedia, and then in 2014 I wrote a summary, this time for the HAA monthly journal, Meteor. My first larger article can be read in the annual publication of the Hungarian Astronautical Society (Magyar Asztronautikai Társaság, MANT), the 2022 Astronautical Yearbook, in the first part of a series (in Hungarian; the next one is expected to be available in the 2024 yearbook at this autumn).

And what about now? The last 2-3 months have been quite busy and this has left its mark on many things. And speaking of which: I am in the process of creating a small space collection, for which I will acquire new pieces depending on the circumstances. My plans include presenting the collection if there is a demand for it (although not in the form of a visitable exhibition). As for the existing difficulties, I trust that a solution will be found as soon as possible.

So this is my personal "science history". With opportunities taken and even more missed, with both success and failure. But as many everyday "wise people" say: this is the order of life. Am I a dreamer? Am I walking in the clouds? Maybe. On some level, yes. However, I am aware of the realities, I take the facts into account - because this is what we do in everyday life, and this is how science works. At the same time - partly based on my own experiences - I don't want to get stuck on the problems of society and "gray everyday life" and dwell on them. Clearly, solving most of them takes priority, that's not a question. But in my opinion, a person should not live their life buried in them and not strive to get to know the world around them better. There are too many interesting and/or beautiful things around us that simply have to be seen or experienced. Or as the famous physicist Stephen Hawking said: "Look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see, and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious."

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